Let's Be Real

So, you know that video that Sister Graham and I made about the Plan of Salvation?
People have loved it!
A lot of members have shared it which is awesome!

The other day, I sent it to my friend and asked her to watch it.
She had questions and so Sister Graham and I answered them for her.

We also used the video in a lesson with Yifei!

Yifei has an iPhone, so we had him look up the video and watch it. 

We asked what questions he had about it and we answered them.

That was the smoothest Plan of Salvation lesson that I've ever taught out here.
It was simple and powerful.

The Spirit was there and did the teaching.
It was great!

I'm so grateful for the Lord inspiring us to make that video.

I love being a missionary.
I do, I really do.

It's tough.

I'm going to be real with you all.

Being a missionary is so hard.
Sometimes all I want to do is quit.
I miss my family.

I miss my friends.

I miss my pants.

When I want a hug from my dad, I can't get one.

When I want to call my mom and tell her about my day, I can't.

When I want to go to the mall with my sister and relax, I can't.

People don't want to talk to me.

They don't want to hear about Jesus Christ.

I get rejected all day, every day.

I don't get a break.

Even on today "my day off" I still need to find and share.

It is so cold!
I can't stay warm no matter what I do.

My feet get wet, even when I try to keep them dry.

My face freezes and I can hardly smile.

When it's hot, I'm sweaty and gross, and possibly stinky.

My feet hurt from walking so much.

My knuckles hurt from knocking doors.

I'm so tired all the time.

You'd think that 8 hours of sleep is enough, but it's not.

Even if I get to bed early it isn't enough.

I'm emotionally, spiritually, physically and mentally drained.

I don't get any time to myself.

It's hard to be with someone 24/7, even if you like them.

Sometimes I just want to pretend I have big business to do in the bathroom so I can have a few moments to myself.

But, I can't quit.

I won't quit.

I have work to do and it isn't mine, it's the Lord's.

God needs me to do this work, so I will.

I told Him I would, so I'm going to give Him all of my time and effort.

I know this church is true.
I know that this gospel is for everyone.
I need to give my all to my brothers and sisters so we can all go home together. 

Although this is hard, it's so wonderful.
I've seen so many miracles and received so many blessings.

My testimony has grown in ways it couldn't if I was at home right now.

I've grown as a person.
I've learned so much and I wouldn't trade this experience for anything in the world.

I'm still Emma, but I'm better. 

It is incredible to be an instrument in God's hands, to feel Him work through you.

God is molding me and shaping me out here to be the person, wife, mother, daughter, sister, citizen, etc. I can be. 

It hurts sometimes, and is uncomfortable to be shaped, but

"There's no growth in the comfort zone and no comfort in the growth zone."

In this scripture, Joseph Smith is in Liberty Jail. He feels abandoned by God, but then God tells Joseph that everything will be ok. I've felt this several times. I'm so grateful for the answer that everything will be ok, and that God is with me:

Doctrine and Covenants 121:1-10

 1 O God, where art thou? And where is the pavilion that covereth thy hiding place?

 2 How long shall thy hand be stayed, and thine eye, yea thy pure eye, behold from the eternal heavens the wrongs of thy people and of thy servants, and thine ear be penetrated with their cries?

 3 Yea, O Lord, how long shall they suffer these wrongs and unlawful oppressions, before thine heart shall be softened toward them, and thy bowels be moved with compassion toward them?

 4 O Lord God Almighty, maker of heaven, earth, and seas, and of all things that in them are, and who controllest and subjectest the devil, and the dark and benighted dominion of Sheol—stretch forth thy hand; let thine eye pierce; let thy pavilion be taken up; let thy hiding place no longer be covered; let thine ear be inclined; let thine heart be softened, and thy bowels moved with compassion toward us.

 5 Let thine anger be kindled against our enemies; and, in the fury of thine heart, with thy sword avenge us of our wrongs.

 6 Remember thy suffering saints, O our God; and thy servants will rejoice in thy name forever.

 7 My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment;

 8 And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.

 9 Thy friends do stand by thee, and they shall hail thee again with warm hearts and friendly hands.

 10 Thou art not yet as Job; thy friends do not contend against thee, neither charge thee with transgression, as they did Job.

I love this gospel.
I know it's true.
I know that Jesus Christ is my Savior and through Him, I can return to my Heavenly Father who loves me so much.

I know God is real and I am so grateful for His hand in my life.

I love you all.

I pray that you'll have a great week.

Love,

Sister Heywood